As life expectancy rises, children increasingly find themselves taking care of elderly parents who are often in deteriorating physical or mental health. This can be stressful, both emotionally and financially. But at least on the financial side there are some things you can do to make it easier.
The first thing to do is to talk to your parents about their financial affairs. This may be difficult. Not only is the topic unpleasant, but most parents are reluctant to share their private affairs, even with their children. But persevere. You need to know the names of their lawyer and accountant and details of their bank accounts and insurance policies. Do they have a will, and if so, where is it? If they’re still fit, encourage them to make up a list of the details for you. If not, you’ll have to assemble it with their help. But don’t delay. A sudden accident or illness could leave them physically or mentally impaired, and you’ll have to hunt through their records to find the information.
Once you know their financial picture, you can start to fill in the blanks. At a minimum they should have a will, and you should have a durable power of attorney allowing you to act for them if they are disabled. Encourage them to set up a living will, giving directions for their medical care. Review whether their retirement income and savings are sufficient, especially if they might eventually need nursing home care. Assess whether long-term care insurance makes sense for them. Check out whether Medicare or Medicaid might help.
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